Tough Decision.

Dear me,

I know i've been a tough time now and i want the best solution. I want to make a different and im making it but no body seem to see it. People say " the truth will set you free". but i dont think so cos i've lost trust to people. How am i gonna gain back? but its too late now. I know i did many wrong things but im changing. Just that you didnt see but little thing happen to me,then you said i never change. You know my passed, and i try my very best to change. You know i steal when i was younger but now i stop. I NEVER have the intense to steal. If i wanna get something, i make i have cash to get if not i will borrow from friends. And im proun to say that i DIDNT owe any of them money. I do save money to get my own things. I try to get as cheap as possible. I get my shirt from the home. I buy jean once a year. most of the things i got from people.

Its ok. I did all the wrong things. If talk about God's business, I never give a damn. Stealing is SIN. leading people to slay is a SIN too. I try not to cover things for people. If you ask me, I say yes. If i dont see, i will say no. I know which site is good and bad cos i went tru once. If you say im a hypocrite. erm..let me see. Let me talk some other time. I promise.

I cant sleep for pass few days but im trying to relax my mind. I cant eat but im trying to eat. I loosing weight but people didnt see it. Its ok,Im fine with it. Its the first time that i can sit on the bed one whole day to think about my pass and my future. Im tying my best to do my decision after CNY. God,help me to make a good decision.


If decision said i must go out,then i accept it. And i promise i will make a different and come back with a success. I will pursue my dream and work it hard. When i come back,i will look different, more feminine, and Fearing God' people. I will help back the home cos its one of my dream. You will never know my dream that kept in my head for a long time. I gonna work it out cos ever time i say things, i never do. For this time,my age is going up and up,im really need to work somethings out for my life. I cant depend on people anymore. I must be Independence.


GOD, please help me to be more mature and focus on You.



to be continue...